3 responses

  1. avatar
    Kentucky lady
    31st July 2013

    Exactly. I agree with the post above. If someone says they’re gonna call.. You’d expect they would. After all, you have no reason to think they wouldn’t. But then, it’s like they take it for granted. They don’t call. I don’t think they forgot. It could be a handful of things. Try to stay calm, stay busy and just watch how he acts in the next few weeks. This should give you a really good indication on how well the relationship is developing. If he doesn’t call at all, it wasn’t meant to be. When a guy wants to talk to you, he’ll call. Meanwhile, carry on. It’ll be difficult since you can really miss and like the person, but keep steady and don’t confront. Stay positive. They want someone who will not change and be an ass to them? Every guy is different. Good luck

  2. avatar
    15th December 2010

    Thanks for writing this post. This one like your previous one 'Ladies, Tell Him' really do lift the lid on the minds of some men.

    I am like one of those women you described, I remember what you said, what time you said it and I can even remember what I was wearing and doing when you said it. The mental note is made and I will keep it locked firmly in my mental little black detective diary should you fail to call.

    Honestly I don't make an issue of it all the time. Now when it's a constant thing, then yes I'll bring it up. I'm at the point in (now he's calling…but I'm commenting on your post….it can ring HA HA)…I'm at the point in my life (age 31) and stage in my life where it's a simple, "look, no need to say it for the sake of saying it to pacify me, call when you want to call, I don't need to be hearing I'll call you later and you don't." I actually found this to be more effective. Rather than me just get on an on about missed verbal appointments, which you so rightly pointed out we women hold dear and memorise, I just make my little speech and refuse to expect that call.

    @Belle we women don't need to start acting like men, that is why we are women and they are men. It doesn't and it won't work because we aren't equipped to understand the male psyche enough to adopt it. It seems in the new millenium this is the new approach for women who maybe somewhat frustrated in how men are in relationships/dating/chasing game and adopt this "if you can't beat em TRY and join em" attitude. A man won't want a woman with a male mindset unless he's gay. The best way to deal with men, is to learn why they do/say the things they do and do what you need to do based on that. Nothing more. Nothing less.

    Back to the general comment again. From a woman's POV, for us this is frustrating. Now I don't care how independent a woman claims to be, every woman has waitied for his call at some point in their lives. Every woman has put off doing something like going to see that movie, or washing her hair because he said he'll call her later. We can't help it. Like you said, you tell us something we're believing those words. "he said he'll call, he's going to call. Even though he might not, he still may call." Then when he doesn't and our scalps are itching the next day because we should have washed it the night before, or all your friends had a great time at the cinema we are VEX. Then when he eventually calls we don't answer and become unavailble aka payback or like you stated pick up and don't say much.

    It's very rare for women to say things like I'll call you later and reneg on it. We put ourselves in the man's position and say "I could never say I'm going to call him later and then just go home to my bed, that's just badmind." We feel less important, and more importantly dumb for believing those 3 words "I'll call you" yet again.

    But, no matter how many blogs are written, this will always be a battle of the sexes issue when it comes to dating and relationships…the "I'll call you" syndrome.

    Great post

    Thanks again.

  3. avatar
    10th December 2010

    HAH! This is sooo true, not that it’s ever happened to me, im far to good of a conversationalist and a cool person for men to never want to speak to me again.
    But yh I guess we women do need to calm down and start acting like men, but its like why cant men say farewell in a way that wont make a women feel like shes being promised something and at the same time giving her something, anything to look forward to; for example, “hope to see you soon”. He isnt promising anything there so he cant really get in trouble, its simple dont say you will call when you wont or say ill call in the future, be specific if you must, its only fair

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